No Flights, Just Feelings: Pride Thoughts, Pool Parties, and Gay Men's Group
Pride, Pause, and the Soft Work of Becoming Pride is this weekend in Des Moines, and honestly? I’m not sure if I’ll be out and about. I say this every year. There’s always a little internal tug-of-war—part of me wants to feel connected, visible, celebratory. Another part of me feels distant from what Pride has become. Maybe it’s burnout, maybe it’s age, maybe it’s the realization that the rainbow capitalism and the overly “family-friendly” vibe don’t speak to the parts of myself I want to celebrate. I’ve been thinking a lot about how Pride has shifted. When I was younger, it felt edgier, grittier, less polished. There was something raw and real about it. Now it often feels like it’s been sanded down—like the edges were too queer, too sexual, too honest. And while I understand the push for “inclusion,” I miss the mess. I miss the unapologetic queer joy and rage and lust and softness. The stuff that wasn’t meant for mass consumption. Still, I might go see Aly & AJ perform—because nos...